>at last

I feel able to blog…

disabled (I chose that word carefully) by my guilt and terrible state of mind I was unable to post for the last two days.

How very interesting – blogging as a reflection of the darkness of your soul… maybe I’ll muse more on that in a future blog but it does very well reflect the ‘forelock tugging’ Lou that Tim sometimes gently laughs at.

So there we were…

faced with the big decision – to return to the existing school or try out a new one. our weekend was wrought with angst.. I set a deadline (as I am wont to do)…

we struggled, prevaricated, cogitated and eventually…

wimped out…

can you believe it (I can hear a few gasps)…

but wait…

so we decided that the new school in exactly the same format as the old one wouldn’t work.
we cant go to the Steiner school that we do like until august.
we have to get by till august.

so we decided to go with the flow and try to send him back (bear with me guys cause there is a temporarily happy ending here).

So we broke the news to laurie and he dealt with it well – understanding that we had to make it through this term and then all would be better!!!!

Laurie and I walked down to the school on Monday and went inside the building ( the psychiatrist somehow felt this was really significant). I knew it wasn’t because it wasn’t that hard for him to do. It’s not the building that causes him pain – it’s the CHILDREN.

Tuesday (today) we dutifully followed instructions and turned up to have a chat with his teacher. He was cool about that and took some photos of his flickr art and of hector to show his teacher.

Oh no —– ambush

unprepared and without ammunition we were caught in a room for an hour with the bloody headmistress and his teacher…

for an hour we were treated to a monologue about behaviour, rules and her authority.

Laurie understood about 40% of what she said which I did find an amazing percentage because whilst it was happening I estimated 20%. God she was so tedious… The teacher didn’t get a word in edgeways.

Apparently the kids all call him a girl because of his hair (well blow me down!). Of course they don’t mean to be horrid. They didn’t realise – ah bless!!!!

What about the ‘Laurie the loser’ nickname – oh well some of the children said that when Laurie didn’t ‘get his own way’ in group work and got upset he would call himself a loser —

as I said in my reply to their exclusion report ‘it is hardly surprising that he refers to himself in this way given that he has been persistantly called this for over a year by his peers’ (mummy rant mode coming on)

so I sat and let her harangue him. She made him cry (she made me cry). she made us both very very angry…

we left saying we’d come into school tomorrow at 9.00.

OK so you can kick us when we are down but don’t think we will lie down forever. I feel bad that I let her do that to us today. Where is the lioness that sarah mentions?

They paid no heed to his needs. They did not acknowledge his sensory overload issues.
I mentioned that the children banged on the tables when the teacher had an important announcement. I said that laurie did not understand this and that it hurt his ears.

I told them that I had suggested to laurie that it may be intended to be like a drumroll. His teacher said that it was and he was prepared to change this. The headmistress said that it was a standard method for getting the attention of children and to focus them to hear important announcements.

I let him and all kids with sensory overload down – I didn’t say ‘ this would have the opposite effect on children who had sound sensitivity issues’. She told the teacher she would talk to him later and it was clear she was not prepared to change this practice for one kid – particularly one who blatently defies her and doesn’t recognise her authority.

by the way woman – I did mention the words autistic spectrum disorder. He is being assessed for asd you know…

Well the lioness is prowling now and so is Tim the lion.
We are not sending him back…
they, and the educational psychologist and the child psychiatric team can all take a flying leap.
we know it is not OK to send him back.
The school now know that we are appealing against the exclusion ( and she has all her guns out) – met someone who works in the school who agreed re asd but couldn’t talk about it with me. How neat it would be for them if they ‘bent over backwards to accomodate’ laurie and then had the opportunity to exclude him again before the hearing.
so bend over mrs headmistress… if I was any good at cartoons I would do one…
we are standing together on this one. We don’t quite know how we will do this yet but we know we will.
Here is picture of a lioness to prove it…
pale & interesting
and I finally did the unthinkable and am signed off on sick leave for stress for two weeks.
relief…

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